Understanding that part of Christian life where maturity means not messing up.
There's an expression in Bahasa, "tahu diri", meaning: don't be arrogant, knowing our place, don't get cocky, take nothing for granted, be thankful.
We had a "sobering" reading , sharing and discussion on Exodus 34 yesterday evening in our online prayer fellowship. It showed two sides of the coin in which we can always put our hopes and trust in God.
Firstly, יהוה Yahweh, The God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob is just. He's all for righteousness and justice. God has no confusion regarding moral compasses, He's the way, truth and life. So whatever kind of injustice, wrongdoings, mistreatment, or malpractices we've experienced in this life, especially when the perpetrator seemingly got away with it, while you're left hopeless and powerless, and even when nobody would stood for your cause, God is and He will. At the very end of all things justice will be served. As we ponder and rest our souls in this, let's consider the next truth.
Secondly, God is feared even more because of his mercy and his faithfulness in keeping that covenant of redemption. That is even truer because He has no confusion between His rooting for either justice or mercy. Regardless of our admittance & acknowledgment, it's us who desperately need the live-giving grace of God.
Now, Khesed חֶסֶד (mercy/lovingkindness) as mentioned in Exodus 34:7 is never a sign of weakness. Just as it is mentioned in Lamentations 3:23, God's Emunah אֱמוּנָה (faithfulness, which by the way shares the same "root" as Amen אמן) is something we, the prodigals can go home to, to be rest assured of.
The fact of us being saved from sin presents us with a much needed tension rather than a naivety of wanting to cling to our limited understanding on "salvation by grace". Being human & instinctively manipulative as we are, knowing God's justice is better for health. Our limited understanding would conclude that salvation can be lost just because we hear a passage to "work" on our salvation with fear and trembling, so be it, may our flesh be crucified so we can rise with Christ rather than to cling to false sense of salvation "by grace" and live carelessly.
God's said to מֹשֶׁה Moses, "I will make a covenant before all your people". Observe closely, the word translated as "before" in this passage was not לפני "lefnei" nor לפניך "lefanekha" (a common word to be translated into "before or in front of you"), but rather נגד "neged" (against you), still in front in position but with the opposite spiritual atmosphere.
While לפני "lefnei" suggests a neutral or friendly mood, נֶגֶד "neged" is something one would use when he/she is dealing with an unknown entity, showing neither trust nor support. Have you noticed already, "your people" (not My people), addressing the Israelites in a "neged" negative manner, all these are just like making a legal agreement to prevent breach.
However, there's a duality through which we can read neged נֶגֶד. In Gen 2:18, there's another form, כְּנֶגְדֹּו kenegdo which can mean placing something against someone at extreme proximity so that the person is embraced/covered thus he's protected.*
Neged and Kenegdo, The commandment of love is fulfilling the demands of the previous testament. Mercy and lovingkindness which often translated as "kasih setia" in Bahasa, meaning "a faithful consistent love", is never weak, permisive nor baseless, instead it is firm and infallible, established on the purest, most sacred thing there is, God himself who is (pure) love, binding Himself with humanity, turning sinners into saints, outcasts into beloved.
God has been clarifying time and again His unprecedented unparalleled mercy. We're untrustworthy yet He's decided to love and save us. Christ's coming and sacrifice are clarifying our sinfullness that is a breach against Himself, that sin won't have a getaway, and -at the same time- the cross is clarifying His decision to safely embrace us by letting death engulf Him, Jesus, The Word incarnate. There's this continuous mysterious entanglement between God's gracious gesture and the intercession of those graced with hearts that are drawn to Him, creating two way streams of intercession and redemption throughout the course of mankind's history.
Therefore, Christians who've become too familiar with God's grace upto the point risking to take it for granted and becoming careless with their wonderous gift, risking in becoming not so "tahu diri", they need to know that IF it wasn't because of God's mercy, הוא נגדנו "Hu negdanu" He was (and would still be) against us, as He is with the rest of this rebellious humanity. The covenant (renewed through המשיח Christ) is what makes us (who once far) near, who were not God's people because of sin, now becoming His own inheritance. Remembering what we once were NOT gives us more appreciation and thanksgiving of who we are now in Christ. "Tahu diri" is probably a great expression for us to respond and reflect on our salvation as we present ourselves daily so that our wonderous experience would become others' as well.
Blessings & love from your fellow coming of age Christian :)
* Reflections on "kenegdo", "khesed" and "emunah" was inspired and enriched through the sharing of my dear pastor friends, Rev. Florian Simatupang (IES CTK) & Rev. Decky Pendowo (GBI Khayyalim), also shared perspective by Ptr. Dr. Timothy Athanasios N. ❤️🙏
Thanks to the faithful relentless ministry of Ptr. Tommy C. Pacatang (IES NW & IES PIK) who's been hosting our heartwarming daily prayer fellowship ever since the wake of COVID19 pandemic. May this reflection resounds and resonate the passion of "Love God, Love others and Reach The World".
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